When I was younger, I loved playing The Game of Life. You know, the game made by Hasbro where you choose your little, plastic car and spin the wheel and see where your adventures take you.
Anyway, I tried so hard to get exactly what I had planned and prepped for, in hindsight, it took all the fun out of the game.
I bring this up because, lately, I've been thinking about real life. Dangerous, I know, but I've made parallels between my life and the game I played as a child. My decision to go to NAU comes to mind when I think of this. So, here's the story. The abridged version, that is.
If you had asked me where I was going to college at the beginning of my senior year, I would have told you the University of Arizona. That was my dream school and it had always held a special place in my heart. When I decided that I wanted to go into Advertising and Public Relations, I looked into what my perfect college had in store for me. Unfortunately, U of A did not have a strong program in those things. After I accepted the fact that I would have to reevaluate my choice in college, I did some research on the programs through BYU, and almost reluctantly, the program through NAU.
Now, if you had asked me if I was considering NAU for my college at the beginning of my senior year, I would have just laughed. There was no way I was going there! That wasn't part of the plan, and remember, I was the girl with a plan.
Plans change.
With my choices now being BYU and NAU (BYU being my first choice, obviously) I waited eagerly to hear from BYU. I was already accepted into NAU and offered a scholarship, but to be honest, I wasn't all that excited about it. I was going to BYU. I had become excited at thought of going there and I was willing to shift my school from the U of A to BYU.
The day came when I clicked into byu.edu to see what the verdict was.
Application: declined
What? I didn't get in? Why didn't they want me? I felt my carefully molded plans crumbling around me. It was a Saturday, and I had to prepare for a lesson I would be teaching the next day in church. The lesson was about trials and overcoming them. I watched a video that day for my lesson that told the story of a girl who was going through serious medical problems. She discussed how she could either let the trial destroy her, or define her. She used the love of God to pull herself through. She didn't get better physically, but she became a spiritual giant after realizing that God had amazing plans for her; she just had to trust him.
That's when it hit me. I had never asked my Heavenly Father what he wanted of me. In humble prayer, I asked him for forgiveness, comfort, and if NAU was where I was supposed to go to school. It was. Huh. That day started off as one of bitterness and anger. Anger at myself. Anger at God. It ended with a much more humble version of myself.
However, being me, I decided that after two years of going to NAU, I would just transfer to BYU. This again, was something I had come up with on my own, instead of asking for guidance. My answer this time was, "Not yet. Trust me". I've come to the conclusion that this is Heavenly Father's favorite phrase for me. It's always a gentle reminder that his plans are greater than mine. I need to trust that.
My name is Camille Ann Kartchner. I am now a sophomore at Northern Arizona University, studying Strategic Communications with a double emphasis in Advertising and Public Relations. Oh, and a minor in French. I've come to absolutely love NAU, but I still would like to get my Masters degree in Mass Communications at BYU Provo. I'm a lot more open to change now. I want to travel the world, volunteer somewhere for the LDS church where I can speak French, influence people for good, and be brave enough to chase after all of my dreams. Most days, I don't know what I'm doing with my life, and I'm starting to be okay with that.
